Sara thank you so much for sitting down with us and sharing your story about your spiritual journey. You mentioned that you are on a journey of finding your faith and getting to know yourself. I understand you are also healing from the transition (passing) of your sister. I am careful to use the words transition because at MentalHappy we believe that souls simply transition (change form) but never die. Let's chat a bit about your journey:
Can You Tell Us What You Mean By "Finding Your Faith"? And Where Have You Been Looking For It? Under the Bed, In Cabinets, Perhaps You Left It At a Friends House? (LOL, Just a Little MentalHappy Humor).
I grew up in the Catholic faith and it was just about going to church on Sundays and learning the rosary. At 16 years old I started to question EVERYTHING I was told and part of me knew there had to be more. I have been in and out of churches for 13 years "looking" for my faith, searching inside myself and also searching in life. I did a variety of things like pushing myself to run 5K's, getting crafty, doing photography, taking a train from Chicago to Connecticut, skydiving in Las Vegas, etc. I was always coming up short never and feeling fulfilled. In August of 2002, I was in a horrible accident, my car did a front flip and 3-4 rolls into a ditch with my friend in the passenger seat because I fell asleep at the wheel. We were both able to walk out of my car and she had minor injuries and I had a few more severe injuries internally but no broken bones. The sheriff told me, point blank, "if you didn't have your seatbelt on, you would have been decapitated." Then and there, I knew that God was real and he saved us. I'm here for a purpose. Sometimes I feel as though when things work out for me and go smoothly, they are just coincidences BUT then there are times when I feel this sense of no coincidence-it's God working for me and His plans are falling into place. In January 2015, I attended service at a non-denominational church, Harvest Bible Chapel and I felt as though I started a new beginning and found my faith. Right now I'm in a rough spot, lots of questioning, searching in the bible, trying to get time for me (painting pottery, crocheting, sewing, crafting, and coloring) and pretty lonely without my sister.
What Did You Love The Most About Your Sister?
The thing I loved most about my sister was her infectious laugh. She and I were known to get into laughing fits that would inevitably get us in trouble. She was a bold, humorous, sharp soul...who loved to have fun.
During Your Spiritual Journey What Are Some Things or Activities You Are Doing To Get To Know About Yourself?
On this spiritual journey I have taken 2 bible studies, spoken to women who have felt like they were searching for meaning/purpose, I have spent more time in nature and photographed the environments I'm in and the beautiful nature around me and I have really found out some deep and profound things about myself...I have come to terms with the fact that I'm an introvert, I'm VERY visual, I need to create with my hands, my postpartum depression (with both kids) took me on a horrendous roller coaster but I have bits of wisdom to share with other moms who may be going through it, and I've learned that you absolutely CANNOT pour into anyone or anything if you have an empty vessel, so you need to give yourself self care and fill your vessel.
Tell Us The Best Thing About Your Journey So Far?
The best things I've learned about this spiritual journey are:
1. I've learned to forgive myself more because I will never be perfect but I will always be in progress.
2. I am a "signs" person... When I see a cardinal in a tree I feel as its my sister or Grandma saying "Hello", certain movies/songs play when I am thinking about them, and when my Grandma was in the hospital in California, after her stroke, I had a dream that was calm and so eerily quiet where my Grandma was watching one single fish swim in an aquarium and I was looking at her from behind...to make a long story short a lot of people, including myself, thought that she getting ready to die and meet Jesus.
The Inevitable Contrasts In Life Such As Loss, Relationship, Work, Illness Are Often Times The Vehicle Driving Us Toward Inner Growth and Causes Us To Focus A Bit More on Our Desires (real wants). What Has The Contrast You've been Presented with Allowed You To Focus On?
The past contrast during my life's journey so far have pushed me to focus on family and my desire for more family time. My sister and I grew up and we grew distant for awhile but then we started to come back but it wasn't long enough. Time here is short and we need to laugh more, enjoy each other's company, open our homes and not be so divided and alone.
So Many of Our Followers Are Looking For Happiness Or Ways To Feel Good. What Advice Would Give To Someone Else On A Journey To Healing (Emotionally or Physically)?
The advice I would give to someone who is hurting (working on healing) is:
1. FORGIVE yourself, you're doing what you can and you're in progress.
2. Coloring books and wine it's actually a good, safe combination.
3. Use smells that you like in candles, oils, fragrance sticks, flowers or anything else that makes you use one of your bigger senses.
4. Go out into nature! Take the beauty of this world in. Take pictures!
Do You Practice Positive Self Talk or Have Any Positive Affirmations That You Like To Say To Yourself (Or a Good Prayer)?
Sometimes I'll tell myself, "Sara, you are a great mom. You housed these two screaming children who are so overdramatic that you feel an Oscar should be given out for the best duo in a drama series because their acting is amazing! :) I also remind myself of my strengths and the God has given everyone a purpose and I'll find it.
Also it's just really nice to have a cup of hot tea and try to pray or read the bible.
I self affirm that: "I am loved more than I know, and I'm never alone."
It takes a tremendous amount of courage to open up and be vulnerable. There is strength in accepting "what is" and "where you are in life". The more you can stop being so hard on yourself, or speaking negatively about your situation and find little ways to cope as Sara mentioned, coloring or getting out in nature the more you will be in a better place to allow God, the Universe, Jesus, or Source to work its magic in transforming your current situation to your true desire which is feeling good. Feeling good could mean a better understanding of self, a new romantic relationship, a healthy/healed body or more money.
Everything is always working out for you, I promise.
A very special thank you to our awesome MentalHappy Human Sara W.
-Love & Light,
Tamar - Founder & MentalHappy Human
My IG: @FindTamar